AFTER THE COMPETITION
Student Letters
To: Mark Zuckerberg
Dear Mr Suckerburg,
May I take issue with you on the name of your social media site, Facebook? The salacious use of the word ‘book’ in the title, in my opinion, is nothing short of literary blasphemy! When one thinks of books, literary greats such as Dan Brown and Stephanie Meyer spring to mind. Brown’s ability to write five novels about the same thing and Meyer’s unconventional use of the semi-colon are equally impressive. I pride myself on having completed The Twilight Saga and The Da Vinci Code series – original, well-written and gripping.
It seems, however, that Facebook users are less well-read than me as most seem fundamentally incapable of stringing together a grammatical, coherent sentence. The word ‘definitely’ causes the most problem, as it is unclear whether the user is indeed determined or unwilling, as they declare: ‘YES! DEFIANTLY’. I’m quite sure this contradiction is unintentional. There is equal, exasperating confusion of ‘your’ and ‘you’re’. I blame predictive text, and the widespread neglect of the general public to proofread their poorly written ‘interesting’ pieces before posting.
Facebook permeates society like an infectious disease, and I think you have a duty to police such posts, to prevent them from littering the site and eliminate this barbaric crime against grammar with immediate effect.
Yours faithfully,
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